Time Spent
Jim Croce wanted to save it in a bottle. Sandy Denny asked who knows where it goes (although my favorite version is by Nanci Griffith and friends so I'm sharing a link at the end). Pink Floyd said once it was gone, and the song was over they thought they’d have more to say. They also reminded us that it’s an acceptable trade for money. As for the actual value, well, your mileage may vary.
The Eagles hoped that someday, we would find it wasn’t really wasted.
I’m talking about the elusive concept of time. There are theories about time traveling, timeline jumping and parallel universes running alongside each other with different versions of ourselves, all at the same time. Both children and grown-ups alike know that time isn’t linear. How else can you explain how slowly the clock ticks through Friday afternoons, compared to the speed at which Sunday evenings or summer holidays fly by?
When I was a kid, my mother would warn me not to wish my life away. I didn’t pay a lot of attention then because, at the time, I had my entire life ahead of me to waste and no real concept of what she meant. I later decided it was pragmatic advice, so I adopted the practice of wishing it were last Friday afternoon through most of my career. Not that it helped much, time still marched on.
Looking back over three decades of my working life, I can’t say that I did anything meaningful within those eight-hour blocks of time. What I can say is that I made sure that the paycheck for everyone else putting in their time, for whatever reason the “powers-that-be” deemed important, was correct and on time every pay cycle. I didn’t change the world, or even improve upon it, but I made sure I didn’t upset someone else’s world by getting their pay wrong. Say what you like, no matter how much some people might like their jobs, the reason we go to work is because of the money we’re paid in exchange for doing so.
It’s a difficult balancing act. We need money to support our basic needs and to make our lives more comfortable, yet the process of going to work to earn that money takes us away from the life we’re supporting. I wish I had some sage and helpful advice to offer about how to do better at this, but like most everyone else, I simply did the best I could at the time.
Now that I’m free from the restraints of the corporate world, I’m facing the challenge of making the most of my time. The balance has shifted, I now have fewer responsibilities and more free time. I also have less money and in the beginning my goal was to use my skills and free time to generate a bit of side income. Things haven’t quite worked out that way yet but the work I’m doing is fulfilling and satisfying and isn’t really working for me at all. It’s something completely new to me. It’s a vocation and a purpose.
Writing has always been my first love and sending this column, such as it is, to you each week leaves me feeling happy and satisfied. The time I set aside for this is non-negotiable. I’m also finishing the story I started writing about The House last year and planning the second-generation tale of The Faeries in Central Park, set in New York City in the 1930s with my mother and her favorite cousin as the protagonists.
A few weeks ago, I began teaching a friend how to read tarot. Wrapped up in the lessons, our weekly sessions have developed into a healing process and an exploration through new and uncharted waters for my friend, and a deeper understanding of how I can best use tarot to help others, for me. Although this aspect came about unintentionally, the resulting process has been a deeply meaningful experience.
I’ve joined the Tarot Association of the British Isles and after my probationary period, application, and acceptance, I’ll become part of their endorsed professional readers’ network. An ongoing requirement for this designation is that I volunteer to provide free readings through their network on a regular basis. I won’t receive financial compensation, but written tarot readings are one of my strengths, and my objective is to have a positive impact wherever I can. Starfish style (it matters to this one).
I’m contemplating the creation of a YouTube channel, under The Mystic’s Parlour banner, directed at subjects that benefit from a visual medium, such as tarot. I’d like to teach workshops on tarot and charm casting on YouTube and in a live, virtual environment. Tarot has proven to be well suited for this, and I think charm casting could be too once I’ve worked out the coordination of mailing the charm sets and materials. Both are secondary projects right now (but watch this space). I’m going to make sure all the other plates are spinning well first. I’m not at all comfortable ‘on camera’ so this will be a challenge in growth.
This is a laundry-list of the ways I plan to spend my time, and the planning itself is also at the cost of time. Like any investment, it may or may not come to fruition. Situations change and things don’t work out like we planned, yet if we don’t drive the plan then often the plan happens without our consent. The one thing I’ve found when deciding what I want to do is that I’m much happier with the decision when I remove money from a primary level of importance in the equation.
I’m making an intentional effort not to allow myself to become influenced by what other people are saying, doing, or creating. It’s easier in theory, this ‘staying in my own lane, minding my own business’ way of thinking, and I’m not always successful (nobody’s perfect). But I’m making progress in being true to myself and, with practice, this approach has helped me learn to appreciate the accomplishments of others. Everyone deserves respect and to benefit from the work they put into their projects, and there’s room for all of us to do our thing and be ourselves.
The only thing that matters, that has ever really mattered, is what we do with the time we have right now. If you have time to do something that will make the world a little better for someone else, and that in turn makes the world better for you, then it’s time well spent. If it takes every waking moment in the day to go to work in order to keep a roof over your head and food on the table, and whatever time you have left over at the end of the day is used getting the kids to dance class or soccer practice, or take care of your own needs, then that’s what you’re supposed to be doing right now. Time becomes more precious, the further down the road we go. But even an hour spent worrying about whether we’re spending it the ‘right’ way, really is wasted time.
Nanci Griffith and Friends. Who Knows Where The Time Goes:
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